Neal came home from work on Friday to me, blue with professional envy, and his joy at having a few days off deflated. I could see it in his posture, in his face. And I felt like a jerk. Who wants to come home to glum Beverly? Sure, part of a relationship is being able to air out the prickly stuff, but sometimes, despite knowing how fortunate I am and feeling grateful for all that is good in my life, I give in to the easy thing: complaining.
After about an hour of conversation, we decided to institute Friday Night Complaints. We’ll try to refrain from petty complaints during the week (there’s a difference between the petty complaints and real issues that warrant discussion) and save them up for Friday night, when we’ll get ’em out all at once. The benefit we expect: most complaints will be forgotten (petty, natch), and we can clear the air and our minds and turn our attention to enjoying each other and our lives.
In that weird way the Internet has, as soon as an idea blooms, I see related information everywhere. Rachael posted a link to this Joshua Becker post. Reading it, I felt invigorated to quit my griping and strive for gratitude, the far more becoming mindset, as my default attitude. What better time than November to focus on this shift?
Here are a few things, in addition to Friday Night Complaints, that I’m trying:
- Add Complaint and Gratitude pages in my bullet journal. I feel so silly writing down the complaints and rewarded by the gratitude list.
- Examine complaints to see what I can change. If it’s in my power to change a situation, I’ll aim for change. If not, no point griping about it!
- Take it one day at a time. Becker reminds us how hard it is to say “I’ll never do this again”. Instead, I’ll wake up each morning and tell myself I’m going to resist complaining just for that day. I can do almost anything for one day, right?
- Celebrate all I’m grateful for. My #DigiWriMo project this month is an Instagram collection under #30daysofgratitude.
One thing about which I’m grateful: the tremendous response to Craft Friday. Viva the rebellion!
You know what? I love the idea of adding complaint and gratitude pages to the bullet journal. If you get the complaints out of your system, there’s more room for gratitude! It can be difficult to be grateful when you are all wrapped up in a complaining mode. Brilliant idea.
Not complaining is a great concept. I don’t think I do actually complain very much but I’m going to try and be more aware of it and see if that’s really true.
I love the idea of airing my complaints to the privacy of my journal…and I’m trying not to share them with others. Don’t you find that one person complaining quickly spreads? I wish positive words had that same momentum! Thank you for the links… and I’m really enjoying your #30daysofgratitude!